Archive for the ‘How To Make Money’ Category

The Musings of a Genius: Nick Throlson

February 12th, 2010

How high am I? High enough to write this post. I had to celebrate 420 readers.

I know Nickycakes talked about Nick Throlson before, in his 10 worst blogs post, but I feel like this video deserves some special attention.

If you’re new to affiliate marketing, you can learn a thing or two from Nick Throlson’s video. It is truly full of insight into how this internet thing works. Like if you’re sitting there, pants on the ground, you might be wondering how people can make monies online – obviously everything out there has already been thought of.

So what can you do, lost child, about your mindset to get your paper right? You have to think outside the box. You have to have time to think.

You have to think … in the park.

Some of you people have seen this video before but didn’t quite grasp its genius. This is why I’m writing these notes – so you can get all the juicy information Nick drops on your heads.

Alright bro-ski. We’re gonna talk about full websites versus landing pages. Why? Because that’s a common question among everyone in the industry. We need to know what works better – but different people have different opinions. Let’s analyze Nick’s expertise on the matter.

Here’s what Nick thinks about landing pages.

1. Lot of affiliate marketers don’t know how to make a full website so they
2. Hire someone for 60 bucks. Get an LP Done. Slap it up.
3. Put some offers on them, and review them.
4. Do some PPC.
5. ……
6. $$$$

See this shit is easy!

But! BUT! If you use Wordpress, because it has plugin for SEO, or Jamula for Meta Tags, you can save a lot of time. A lot of that time can be spent making money.

You can build a full website and just make a profit off of it by adding an aWeber form.

Ranking SEO vs Ranking PPC

Nick talks about the reasons why you might want to make a full website, because you can rank it SEO, all while ranking it PPC. What’s the difference between the two? For newbies it might be tough to understand, but if you collect opt-ins you can get a lot better conversions.

Some people here might disagree with Nick Throlson about ranking SEO. I call those people idiots. Nick is an expert in the field so you better know your shit before arguing with his facts.

Which Networks to Work with

Another great tip for newbs. Say you want to start making like $20,000 a day. Which network do you sign up with so you can do that?

Nick recommends only the best networks, which are Hydra, Neverblue, and Market Leverage. Motive Interactive has some hotter offers too. What matters is that these networks treat you like a professional blogger, like if you were already John Chow or Shoemoney.

You see, in this industry, other networks treat you like crap. He might be talking about network.ppc.bz, where they pour hot candle wax on your neck beard when you sign up. These are the type of scoundrels you do not want to do business with.

Get Money Get Paid with Your Own Products

Nick talks about making your own product. He drops a little nugget of info and talks about how he is going to develop some Wordpress plugins.

Why not just be an affiliate and not deal with customers, maintenance, and support?

Well, Nick smartly has new affiliates not putting all their eggs in one basket. This is good advice, because you never know when a niche can die. Like what if Acai berry died? What if the rainforests couldn’t produce any more berries?

That’s why you want to have your own product. Because when something like Res-V dies, you want to fall back on… you know… Wordpress plugins. That’s really where the money is.

Side Note: ResV is pretty hot right now. I know this video is close to 2 years old. But ResV is like anti-aging in a bottle, so that can never get old right?

Networking and Dreaming the Internet

Definitely network. You can go to Meetup202s and find people to outsource to. When you do this affiliate marketing thing, you’re not going to know everything. So to make the monies online you just have to outsource things that you don’t know. You can surround yourself with other likeminded newbs and outsource to a different group at your Meetup.

More important that social interaction, of course, is reading forums. DigitalPoint, Wickedfire – they are all the same. The trick is to absorb it all. Get your mind full of informative posts on these forums. Trust me, you will learn a lot.

This is the best advice in the whole video. From about 4:20 (ironing) is the gold of Nick’s teachings. If you don’t watch the video just watch the clip. If you have watched the video, watch it again from 4:20 on.

Dreaming about these things means you’ll wake up with thoughts like “Woah I should make a landing page for acai berry” or “Woah, everybody is making money on these ringtones!” or “Woah Google Adsense pays you money for clicks? I need to get my friends click on my stuff.”

All great ideas.

You don’t want to be working all of the time. No, fuck that. Productivity is going to kill you fast. You need to spend time reading these forums, so instead of actually getting anywhere with hard work, you just come across a million dollar idea. With a great idea you can just go up to people and ask for investment because the idea is so good and they will give it to you.

So make ideas happen with outsourcing to people you meet at Meetups. Wordpress and Jamula plugins are pretty much the future of making money online. Just make sure your “Donate Here” button is big enough! Split test it! You never know when Zwinkys is going to die because of government regulation.

That Fly Shit, I’m On It

January 23rd, 2010

Weekend rhymes from Conceptual (Correction: FuckYouBarman!! found it first.)

JUELZ.

DIP.

SET.

Pro Tip – Hiding Your Tracking Code

September 23rd, 2009

Is it still cool to rip LP’s? I guess so.

Most people who jack your campaigns will put in their own tracking codes. There are a number of idiots who will leave yours there, so no need to worry about them. You can fool people who are just smart enough to look for your code.
1. Put your tracking code on the bottom of your page where it should be.
II. Hit TAB like 20 times.
3. If they have Word Warp off then chances are they will not see it.
D. Then read this post.
Step 5. …..
SIX – PROFIT!

There Aren’t Enough No Name Affiliate Networks

July 3rd, 2009

Highest Payouts! The Best Support! Exclusive Offers!

This is the rallying cry of almost every affiliate network out there. With everyone saying it, someone’s gotta be lying right? If the hundreds of networks out there were telling the truth, we’d make infinity money per lead because they would all be one-upping each other until the wheels fall off. Mmmm… infinity money.

So how do you get a piece of this action? How can you start your own network without the hassle of “knowing stuff.” Well, if you’ve failed at affiliate marketing, why not get in on the action where the real money is being made! The middleman!

In today’s PPC.bz, we’ll show you how to bank with hasOffers!

Start Your Own No-Name Network with hasOffers!

If you haven’t sold out to hasOffers yet, it’s time to do so. To be serious for a second, a successful affiliate can probably find value in this platform, and make it work for them. But lets be honest… 80% of affiliates don’t make jack shit, and this is who the product is geared towards.

It’s not like affiliates aren’t signed up to enough networks already. 5-15 is the average, and there is no shortage of no-name networks popping up already. These networks are typically the middlemen of middlemen, and usually have no direct relation to an advertiser, so there payouts will never be as high as a legitimate network. It’s usually a one-man band, and inevitably at some point, their “internet connection will go out” for a few weeks, and all their affiliates will get antsy. One thing leads to another, and a shitstorm breaks out. Some make it back online and payout, but the rule of thumb is you’ll never see your money again.

Let’s lay some motherfuckin’ knowledge down. This industry has more snakes in the grass than an African safari. All we need now is more punk ass kids and greasy Russians starting their own networks just itchin’ to rip you off.

Back on topic… So how is a newb like you going to make money with hasOffers? Here’s how it’s done!

What You Think Will Happen with hasOffers

Sign up Thousands of Affiliates – Just like when you started your first adSense site, you await thousands of clicks and sign-ups from out of nowhere. As soon as you launch your network, you promote it on Wickedfire and Digitalpoint because, YOU’RE TEH CHAMP!
Get Their Data – After hundreds of thousands of affiliates sign-up, you take a peak at their data and run that shit. Obviously all of these newbies are too dumb to cloak, but somehow they are making a killing and you can see all their juicy campaigns. +1 profit.
– The most important step, obviously.
Profit – Sit back, relax, and collect paychecks. It’s that easy. It’s just like affiliate marketing. No hard work at all.

What Will Actually Happen with hasOffers

No One Signs Up – Why? Cause no one gives a fuck about you and your no name network.
Give Up Your Data – You’re the only one running within your network. What’s stopping hasOffers from seeing what you’re doing?
Stress out from Support – If by some really long fucking shot, you sign-up some affiliates, the majority of them won’t make you jackshit. The ones making jackshit will bug you to death about what to do. “How do I make the monies?” “How do I make millions of dollars working 15 minutes a day?” “How do I make money posting links onto Google?”

If you hate people like I do, then you’ll eventually kill yourself from dealing with retards. And affiliate marketing is full of more tards than a short yellow bus.

But Wait, There’s More!

Here’s the cold hard facts: Building a reputable and effective network takes work. A lot of work, a lot of wheeling and dealing, and a lot of stress. Have fun with hasOffers!

Edit
After posting this, I saw a thread on Wickedfire about hasOffers.

This is a gem:

Rumor circling on the back end is that the guys behind HO are shady and have done a ton of shady stuff in the industry. One commentator on one of those blog reviews made a good point on the fact that $799/month on the Enterprise edition does not even begin to cover a fraction of a fraction on hosting cost so the business model is BS as well.

When working with someone fucking with my money, it’s always good to know they don’t have a physical address. (i.e; run out of someone’s basement)

Dominos Pizza Sucks… STILL…

April 22nd, 2009

OH YEA! another post about the worlds worst pizza place.

Every since I’ve ordered pizza using there pizza tracker I’ve gotten emails. I definitely don’t want them since I never order from them anymore. Ok, no big deal… UNSUBSCRIBE… wait 10 days as mentioned in the CAN-SPAM act… keep getting emails… repeat process 5 times… keep getting fucking emails… *MONEY MAKING ALERT* Easy money making scheme. If you live in California order a pizza online then take videos & document unsubscribing and the failures of still getting emails. Then take them to small claims court. You will win. (I hope someone will do this so they will fix their system.)

EPIC failure… I ordered a pizza. XL I believe. I don’t remember the ‘inches’ size which dominos uses. but they used the Large size breadball to make the XL pizza. It was like fucking thin as shit & nasty as fucking hell. If i wanted to a pizza that tasted like it was made on saltine crackers I would have ordered it. SO… I call them… They explain to me they don’t get shipped the XL size bread balls. So they make the XL pizzas w/ the L breadball and somehow i’m supposed to be okay w/ that? Its fucking DOUGH… you know you’re short… maybe add a large and a small size bread ball together? So after this & the email saga & the last saga i’m 100% done w/ dominos…. or so I think…

Two days ago…. My room mate orders dinner. Doesn’t tell me what he ordered or where its from… you can guess where!?!?!? DOMINOS!!! They said it would be to our door in 45 minutes. After 1 hour of waiting he called them. They said the driver was just getting back and then would be right out. Its 2-3 miles down the road… It ended up taking 1 hour 55 minutes to deliver to us. WTF dominos WTF….

All Your Dreams Just Came True

November 21st, 2008

If you’re a ppc.bz regular you know that we expose all those stanked up As Seen On Tv niches. What if I told you that you could go direct to the source for all those offers?! You would sell a kidney to cover PPC costs and start promoting those bitches is what you would do.

And just to prove that I’m not about getting your referral monies on this one, I’m going to do what no aff blogger has ever done. IM GONNA USE SOMEONE ELSES REFERRAL LINK. You read correctly. I just grabbed Barman’s ref link since we all know he needs that moolah.
Barmans ref link

What offers do they have all up in this biatch?
Shamwow, zorbeez, pedegg and other useful g-thangs.

Go make barman some money, he’s running out of sperm to sell.

How To Beat Anyone Out-Ranking You In Google…Yahoo…Msn…

November 13th, 2008

Step 1: Sign up for E*trade.
Step 2: Buy controlling share in the company & take all the search results you want.
Step 3: Profit.

You see how simple that is?

Get money + Get Paid.

It Can Fucking Wait.

November 1st, 2008

When it comes to building your business, there are 4 words that should be echoing in your mind throughout the day; they are “It Can Fucking Wait.”

We’re not talking about checking your stats or chatting with your buddies on Instant Messenger. We’re not talking about checking your RSS reader incessantly throughout the day. And we’re not talking about surfing MySpace, Digg, Fark, Facebook, Reddit, Television or some other very important task you should be focusing on.

We’re talking about developing your online properties. We’re talking about creating new campaigns to drive links and revenue. When we say “It Can Fucking Wait”, we’re talking about those tasks that you keep putting off which, when completed, will start eating up your time to do other things like facebook ur friends.

It Can Fucking Wait.

Just wait and procrastinate! The losers in this world are not the ones who find the greatest excuses to put off doing what they know will make them more money. The losers are the ones that prioritize and seize the day. what phagz.

Don’t create a list of action items to make sure your important tasks get accomplished. Every project you’re working on should be in on the calender for sometime next year. If you’re not moving, you’re choosing the right. Your next step towards making money must be “something I’ll take care of maybe sometime next week, maybe later” If it’s going to help make you money: It Can Fucking Wait.

Some of you may think that you don’t need the “fucking” in “It Can Fucking Wait”. You do. You need that impact, that force, that call to action and mostly, that kick in the ass to slow you down. Otherwise, you’ll end up another loser that had a great idea a long time ago but made a billion dollars. Dreamers make money. Doers are lahmerz. “It Can Fucking Wait.”

This passage is written more than 400 years ago so you know its full of shit:

There is a tide in the affairs of men
Which, taken at the flood, leads on to fortune;
Omitted, all the voyage of their life
Is bound in shallows and in miseries.
On such a full sea are we now afloat;
And we must take the current when it serves,
Or lose the ventures before us.

– William Shakespeare, Julias Ceasar

Cliffnotes of quote for the Shakespearean impaired

Try it. Next time you have an inclining to procrastinate on a task that you know will make you money, write it down & maybe think about doing it next week! HA! I don’t think anyone read this entire thing. Good job if you didn’t if you did you’re definitely a fag.

It Can Fucking Wait.

Does Acai Berry Really Work?

October 21st, 2008

Does Acai Berry really work?

We needed to make sure that the products we were promoting really worked, so we hired a half affiliate, half scientist to jump on that.

At the time of writing it has 5 views, which is equivalent to 347 acai leads due to it’s extreme conversion ratio. Every time you view it, this man is making millions.

To all the wannabe ethugs check out his other videos for more info.

Inspirational Adsense Checks

October 9th, 2008

Now I understand that you may never be able to average 3.47568$ per day (yes, you read this correctly), but I hope these checks bring out your inner super affiliate.

These are not meant to give you false hope that you will ever enter the 0.0652$ per site per day realm.

The check that started the “bid on acai with adsense on your landing page” movement. Straight thugged.

This one changed my view of myspace layout sites with adsense combo:

So legit you can’t read the numbers.

Hopefully this will spiritually stimulate your inner adsense guru.

URGENT UPDATE
I just received word that nickycakes is joining this underwold of future cyber eGangsters.