Tipping Point

In yesterday’s party post, I made a little fuss about people that don’t tip in this industry. Some may think it rude that I call out an entire industry on this point, and others may find it downright disrespectful.

“You’re an idiot! I always tip! :: scoffing sounds :: ”

So you might be asking – “Barman, who are the cheapskates that don’t tip the service staff at industry functions?”

There is no particular person or anything, it’s just a general trend I see (and based on the comments on the last post, I’m not the only one.)

For some reason, I think affiliates think they are entitled to the free shit that networks and sponsors give them. If there is a social function like a party, affiliates feel like “oh the network is paying for everything – I don’t have to spend a dime!” Wrong asshole. The network or sponsor does pay for everything, but they don’t pay the tips for the service at these events. Sometimes the sponsor might feel so bad for the service staff they tip them out, because of the cheap-ass affiliates. This is truly a fucking shame.

But there was particular event that stands with me to this day. An event I never want to repeat.

It was the Denver Affiliate Convention, many years ago (or maybe it was last year.) I wouldn’t have gone to this convention if I didn’t live like 30 minutes away.

Scott Richter of Affiliate.com held an after party event at his “gentleman’s club” called Platinum something or other. Basically everyone in the industry was invited to hang out at the strip club and either look at titties or talk about business.

Anyway, I won’t get into the total mindfuck that was. (Seeing to the Shoemoney logo flash on the TV screens while getting a lap dance made me get a boner and throw-up in my mouth at the same time. The mindfuck is that I don’t know which was responsible for which.)

An hour or two into the night, me and bb_wolfe were outside smoking drugs, and we ran into ladies that were waiting for a ride home. Clearly they were strippers because there are no females in affiliate marketing.

So I asked them what’s up.

“We’re getting out of here.”
“Why is that?”
“We’re not really making any money.”
“Really?”
“Yeah, no one is tipping.”
Really.

The convo went on for a little while longer and they eventually left. I walked back into the club and saw that she was right. There were these sad, nearly lifeless, strippers dancing like they were forced to. If you ever played Grand Theft Auto IV and walked into the virtual titty bar, you know what I mean. Animated and contrived.

It was then I thought to myself – “I never want this to happen to me.”

“I never want to be a part of a party where strippers leave.”

The service staff at these events are the lifeblood of the entertainment. If they aren’t getting taken care of, their hearts won’t be into it. And if they’re not into it – expect slow, nearly unbearable service getting drinks. That in turn will ruin the fun everyone is having.

And if strippers are involved, they will leave.

You don’t really want that, do you?

  • Noooo, keep the strippers!

  • “I never want to be a part of a party where strippers leave.”

    Now that’s a motto to live by.

  • That was truly a weird party. It was awkward all around, even without all the Marcia Brazil drama shenanigans. I wonder if Scott will have another party for this year’s (lame) convention…

  • Affilthyate

    What are you going to do, half of them spent all their available cash on the greyhound bus ticket (I mean plane ticket) to get there and the rented rolex so they can continue to keep up their wickedfire baller persona.

    The other half are so socially inept from never having any actual friends or leaving the house that they have no idea what proper etiquette in these environments is.

    You can’t expect the 1 percentile of true hustlers who knew how to tip good drink service and a lap dance with a little extra enthusiasm long before they ever had huge monies to carry the whole show.

    Though I have to say this story was a little drop of sunshine for me, back in the pre-re-branded days of CPA Empire they jacked us for almost 50k in a lie we later caught them in. Hopefully those strippers quit the next day and went to work for la bohem instead, shout out to Raven, see you next time i’m in town baby.

  • rmk

    “I never want to be a part of a party where strippers leave.” = science to live by

  • “I never want to be a part of a party where strippers leave.”

    = Saying to live by

  • fuck a bitch nigga. aint no bitch gettin a cent out of ya boi dollas.

  • bigstrov34

    sooooo glad you posted about this.. there is a thread on wickedfire that goes on for pages about people preaching how they dont or don’t want to tip.. frankly its disgusting..

    whats the fucking point of rolling in cash if you don’t know how to ball the fuck out?? i mean really giving a bartender 20 bucks for your first drink will insure you get great service for the entire night.. maybe these punks are used to making teh monies from their facebook coupons so they dont know how to spend..

  • :wisdom:

  • I’ll agree that the strippers there were neglected. I don’t think it had much to do with people being cheapskates but that people were there to network. From my point of view, the opportunity to mix with people in our industry is far rarer than a pair of nice tits.

    In my defense, I drank plenty and tipped the bartenders every time. Sadly I was late and missed seeing Marcia Brazil get kicked out.

    • OgreSmash

      ya networking… stfu.

      • Alex Mack

        suck my cock ill murder your family

  • Craig Mullins

    I would have jus paid all the strippers… Then tell them to come to my place

  • I wasn’t at the event in question but agree that not tipping is pretty lame…

  • One thing though dude you did not mention was the event the party in Denver was at the Affiliate Convention which is free to all affiliates. So what do you expect.

    I also find affiliates a lot of the time’s are real cheapasses.

    I remember i went to the spearmint rhino with a bunch of guys from cakes chat and there was like 12 of us and everyone wanted to get bottles so somebody ordered and then came around for money I gave him like 400 i think or so cause there was a couple of people with me and turned out they only got 1 bottle cause thats all the people chipped in…

    So I just went to the bar. And quit going to bar’s with random cake’s chat peeps ;)

  • Brett

    When a nerd without cash goes into a strip club they get taken down. What are these guys doing?

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  • Velvet Mills

    I danced at this event. Ya’ll a bunch of cheap fuckers.